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Marjorie Liu

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Courtesy of an email that landed in my mailbox…

Jun 2 By Marjorie

The terrible thing is, I know some of these things actually happen (but not often, so don’t get scared):

You know you need a new lawyer WHEN….

1. When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.  (NOTE:  This generally happens outside the courtroom)

2. Every couple of minutes, he yells “I call Jack Daniels to the stand!” and downs a shot.

3. He frequently gives juror number 4 the finger.

4. He begins his closing with “As Ally McBeal once said…”

5. Just before he says “Your Honor”, he makes little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.

6. The sign in front of his office reads “Practicing law since 2:30pm”.

7. Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge “Whatever.”

8. He giggles every time he hears the word “briefs”.

9. During the trial, you catch him playing his Gameboy.

10. He tells you his last good case was a “Budweiser.”

Filed Under: Uncategorized

About Me


I write comic books and novels about grumpy warrior women, eccentric demons, plucky fox girls, and men who can shape-shift into tigers. If a merman or gargoyle shows up, all the better!  To learn more about me, please go here.

Upcoming Issue:

Monstress will be back on January 23rd!

For The Media

My agent is Duvall Osteen. Please contact her for any business-related inquiries, including publicity and blurb requests, and speaking engagements: connect@aragi.net

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