This just made me laugh, because I’m about to go walk Lucky (spotted dog, not poodle, because the poodle can be trusted to roam free without a leash as she has never ever flung herself in front of a moving car or tried to chase anything that has wheels) and Ahenodia captures so perfectly the essence of my time with him (minus the parts where he attempts to rip my arms off my body in pursuit of a rabbit, or as I’m sure he calls them, “Those damn rabbits!”):
Because you see, a dog can’t just crap anywhere. It isn’t just a poop, it’s a gesture, it’s a sweeping social manifesto, it’s a statement...For pooping, locations must be scouted with deep and abiding concentration and discernment. Every square of grass must be inspected with a maximum of mind-numbing slowness, and often many many many many many many blocks’ worth of seemingly prime pooping space must be rejected before the perfect space is attained. This is not a job for a layperson—the methods of a true master can seem baffling and nonsensical to a half-awake woman in pajamas and sneakers, or a hungry human who’s run errands all day and wants nothing more than to go home and have her goddamn dinner before it’s time for breakfast again, but these short-sighted naysayers should not be heeded in the least. Where You’ve Pooped will be sniffed by scores of dogs to come, and will engraved in Dog Memories for millenia…or at least until the next squirrel runs by. Approach each such decision with the greatest of gravity.
Did I ever post this Publisher’s Weekly article written about the Author’s at Sea cruise?
Even better are the informal encounters�in the bar, by the slot machines, at the sink in the ladies’ room�that happen when people are confined to a ship together. “It humanizes the authors. Now it’s like we know each other,” says Barbara Dielen of South Milwaukee, as she chats with author Marjorie Liu on the Lido deck one late afternoon. They spend half an hour discussing other authors, trading facts and opinions the way boys talk about baseball stats. And Dielen teases Liu, whose books include a generous amount of sex and violence, “If I saw your author picture I would say you look too nice to write this stuff.”
Actually, I remember that afternoon very clearly. It was one of the most pleasant of my trip.
By the way, here’s the RT ad for The Red Heart of Jade:
I’ve got Lucky’s leash nearby. Wish me luck. Or maybe wish him luck. Either way.